Victims of abuse have long dealt with backlash from coming forward with their experience. Be it verbal, physical, financial, sexual, all of above or perhaps beyond, abuse survivors take on a ginormous burden even after escaping the toxic situation.
Coming forward with one’s experience of abuse is both freeing and completely terrifying. There is no satisfaction in sharing the stories of one’s trauma. There is hardly any comfort in the horrified reactions of friends, families, professors, or classmates. There is often the humiliating fear that your story will not be believed.
The contents of my book, while all based in a personal previous relationship, are far from one of a kind encounters. The private nature of relationships makes it difficult to know if the dynamic between the two partners is healthy or not, so there may be no way of knowing what happens behind closed doors. However, if a friend, loved one, coworker, or anyone you know comes to you with a story of their abusive relationship, I urge you to believe them. There is nothing to be gained from being a victim of abuse, I promise you that.
The introduction of technology has added an entirely new layer to the already complicated topic of abuse. The ability to contact one’s significant other at any hour despite distance, the free reign to spam, new ways to silence them by blocking, muting, hanging up, or just by ignoring their messages in a way that is impossible face to face. It does, however, provide an unprecedented modality of proof. Abuse, written down.
This book is an artistic representation of what it is to experience digital abuse, paired with audio files to fully immerse the reader in the content of the book. The words are all direct quotes, mostly from text messages I received over the course of an extremely abusive three year long relationship. It does not even begin to scratch the surface.
The purpose of this book is to raise awareness that these things actually happen. To readers who have not and may never experience abuse, I ask you to consider my book and other accounts of survivors with kindness. Remember that words and actions like the contents of my book are real and were actually said and done to living, breathing people. To readers who have or are currently in abusive situations, you are not alone, you are capable of being loved, and I promise you that there is life beyond this chapter.
With all of this being said, I feel the need to issue a trigger warning. The contents of this book may be upsetting to readers. It is unfortunately the nature of the topic. Thank you for spending time with my book, I hope that it is eye-opening.
To view the digital content of “Notifications,” click on this hyperlink.